In the beginning, I prayed for GOD to remove this struggle, this "affliction", from me. I almost demanded it sometimes, even stating that if HE didn't then it must mean that those "feelings", "attractions" or "thoughts" were 'normal' or okay, and I would go back! Well, that didn't move HIM to remove them.
But it did lead HIS HOLY GHOST to guide me and lead me in Scripture to Paul crying out to GOD to remove his "affliction" as well, three times he did so. And GOD told HIM, MY Grace is Sufficient for you"!
Amen!! HIS Grace is sufficient for me. The struggle, or "affliction", is allowed for a reason and it has a purpose. It's purpose is to keep me focused on The Cross. It's purpose is to keep me Humble, as I recognize that it is nothing I could've done to save myself and that my life was out of control..... out of my control, and that I am powerless outside of JESUS CHRIST!
Oh Thank YOU LORD, for the struggle! Thank YOU for the affliction! Thank YOU for the "thorn in my side"!!